Annual Review
As I sit here typing this blogpost, I can see some of the leaves on the tree outside our apartment turning yellow, which is an indicator of the next season lurking in the wings - autumn. I personally love the -BER months, as they bring all sorts of wonderful colour into my life, starting with the reds, oranges and yellows, gaudy pumpkins are everywhere, and as the nights draw in, we're turning on the soft welcoming lights in our homes, and possibly introducing candles to the mix. Then the festive season arrives with all its sparkly lights, and suddenly weekends are filled with visits to Weihnachtsmärkte, we're decorating rooms and trees with blinking lights, and things get very twinkly and Christmassy. Yes, yes, I did just say the C word... watcha gonna do about it, huh, huh?!
Kicking all of this off, though, is the celebration of my annual spin around the sun. My birthday usually falls on the autumn equinox, but I see that this year this takes place the night before. However, I also see that the Libra astrological season starts on my birthday, so at least I get to have something happen on the big day! smirk It's not a big 0 birthday this year, but I am hurtling towards 60 faster than I'd like, especially as I still have fond memories of my 50th! It was the last birthday my late husband got to celebrate with me, and we pushed the boat out a little, and had a party. Friends, colleagues, former colleagues and family joined me on the day, and made it a birthday to remember. Eight years later, I still look back and muse at how much has changed in those eight years. I was widowed six months after my 50th, and 2018 was a challenging year from start to finish, even before his death. There were some brighter moments, including the marriage of my oldest niece, meeting her beautiful daughter for the first time, and spending Christmas and New Year's with my family, here in Germany. Weeks later, I met my now fiancé, Ed, online, and 2019 proved to be a wonderful year, for many reasons, not just meeting a new romantic partner. My mum and I took a two week trip to Norway, our first holiday together since I was a baby, and we had a wonderful time exploring the west coast of Norway on a Hurtigruten boat called the MS Nordlys (Northern lights in Norwegian). The trip wasn't all plain-sailing, haha, as a huge storm hit the coast while we were at sea, but our experience was far less dramatic than those of the passengers of the MV Viking Sky, a cruise ship that lost its control of its steering and propulsion, and almost ran aground. Many of the passengers had to be airlifted by helicopters off the ship, in horrendous conditions, all while our little ship was hugging the coastline, avoiding the worst of the weather. I wasn't even aware the incident was happening until my aunt, who lives in southern Norway, messaged me to ask if we were okay, and also to tell us of the drama taking place on the high seas. That storm took place in the first two days of our trip, and thankfully the rest of the twelve days at sea were without incident, and we got to see some of the places we'd missed on the way up, back on the way down (although not all of them). Later in the year, in July, I travelled to Grindelwald, Switzerland for a week's holiday. I had initially planned to be on the trip alone, but things were hotting up on the romance front, and Ed joined me for part of that trip, where he got to fall in love with a place I'd given my heart many years before. Later that year, we also visited Germany for Christmas and New Year, and Ed got to experience the crazy firework culture that Germany has at Silvester - he thought it was insane, but it ticked his "I fucking love this" box in a BIG way, which was hilarious.
2020 started with much promise, although I decided to have a TIA on the way to work one morning, in mid-January. gulp Thankfully, it didn't stop our planned long weekend in Rome, to celebrate our first anniversary in early February, and then Storm Dennis decided to gift us an extra night, when our flight back to the UK was cancelled! And then... and then, life went on an extended visit, via handcart, to hell. Suddenly life was divided into Life Before Covid and Life After Covid. That was also the year that Ed and I decided to move to Germany, which I don't think we're ever planning on repeating, although it has left us with some everlasting memories! 2021 was also a weird year, as covid was still a THING, and everyone was desperate for life to go back to normal, whatever that meant. We were vaccined up, and desperate to travel. We did get to enjoy two trips in July and October to Switzerland that year, as well as a very stressful and expensive covid test trip back to the UK in April that year, to finalise the sale of my house. It was also the year I was offered a job, which was retracted hours later. That experience utterly knocked my confidence, which had already taken a hard knock in 2020, when I was made redundant whilst on furlough.
2022 saw us back in the UK, finally emptying a lock-up we'd hired, and rammed full of shit from my house when we moved in 2020/2021. It was also the first time Ed got covid; we went to Ireland to see my sister; and the year I finally got my foot on the German employment ladder... hurrah! Six months later though, in 2023, I was unemployed... gotta love Probezeit, right? In hindsight, it was a blessing, but it really didn't feel it at the time. Fortunately, six weeks later I interviewed for the job I have now, and still very much love. My travelling time is less than 15 minutes each way, versus the two hours I was having to travel there and back in the previous job, which was situated near Bad Homburg, north of Frankfurt. The previous company was an American company with a German office, so that US "hire and fire" mentality was definitely ever-present - I even remember sitting enjoying my lunch, while listening to colleagues moan and complain about the company - never a good sign! 2023 was also the year I experienced covid for the first time - right in the middle of my Probezeit, which I definitely didn't need! My current employers, a family-run company, and part of a bigger, nationwide organisation, were sympathetic, thankfully, and probably because I wasn't the only person to go down with the CV-19 lurgy that year! We visited the UK just before Christmas too, and it was nice to catch up with people we'd not had the chance to say good-bye to, when we'd left for distant shores, back in December 2020.
2024 started off fairly normally, and then I fell extremely ill in mid-March, resulting in me being off work for over three weeks, the first time I'd ever had that long a sick leave in my life! The road to recovery was long, and our first trip to Lake Garda in September was definitely a balm for the soul. I got to celebrate my birthday on the shores of the lake, watching the sun go down in spectacular fashion - highly recommended, even if it isn't your birthday!
So, the point of all of this blathering is to say, that in the run up to every birthday I do a sort of mental annual review, looking back at what worked for me in the last year, and what didn't. Unfortunately, 2025 to date hasn't gone quite according to plan, and it seems as though the rest of the year I had pencilled is probably going to be busted flush, too. Ageing unwell parents on both sides means we're having to keep all sorts of options open just for now, but I'm not going to let it drag me down mentally... there is still plenty of time to get married, after all!
In the meantime, there's another three week to go until my birthday, which I am planning to enjoy as much as possible, while I am left to wonder what the next turn around the sun will bring? Time will tell, I guess, eh?